Monday, 13 November 2017

Adulting continues

I recently found a photograph of the Cinderella Polly Pocket castle from when I was a child. It was my favourite toy growing up and seeing it filled me with such nostalgia. Remembering those happy afternoons by the fire at my nanny's house, playing for hours with it. I would do anything to just have that feeling back for one moment. Adulting really can be hard and sometimes I think I would honestly love to just be a child again but in reality no I would not.

As much as being an adult does suck sometimes with all the bills, worries and falling in with what you think you should be doing at your age. Being a child was not always easy, new schools, new friends, new homes, new family additions, family issues, losing loved ones. Not to mention the pressure of attempting to get good grades because apparently your life depends on it.
Then your body decides it is going to completely change and suddenly you have to try and make yourself attractive. If you think about it at a young age most people have to deal with a hell of a lot.  I think I have been a worrier since I came out of the womb. Constantly worried about hurting people's feelings, what others would think of me. Even when I was happy my brain would be like but what if....? Which it still does to a certain extent.

Although recently I have realised I am mostly happy with who I am for pretty much the first time ever. Sometimes I worry about my appearance but all in all I am more comfortable with who I am than I have ever been. I don't really worry about what people think of me anymore, Turns out I am more me than I have ever really knew before. Life never really gets easier we always will have those massive things that kick us in the face sometimes. Horrible people will always try and put you down and let you down. What I have learnt more than anything is to always do your best. Be grateful for what you have, enjoy your partners, family and friends, appreciate every single one. Enjoy the little things, surround yourself with people that make you feel good and make you laugh.
More importantly and I know everybody says it but enjoy being yourself!
Your weird, sometimes awkward self! There is only one of you after all, may as well be the best version you can be.

If only I had known this growing up. I am grateful to my mom for always trying to show me this but I do think it is something you have to learn with time.
It is the one thing I would love to tell my 14 year old self.
Stop giving a damn!
I am still learning that people won't always be around, friendships change, people change and that is ok. The ones you do end up with are definitely worth it!

In the last couple of years I have reclaimed my obsession for Disney in all forms including toys... I don't care if I was supposed to have grown out of wanting them.
I have became inspired to create art work again and improve, which I can see is already happening.
I have embraced my teenage emo and bring her out as frequently possible.
I have even started going back to the clubs that I used to go to with a reignited love.
Why the hell not?!

Being an adult can be fun, you can make all your own choices, do all the things that make you happy.
Be who you want to be and be as silly as you like.

I hope this post brings a little bit of happiness as sometimes we really do need it!

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© As told by Emmi
Maira Gall